Looking Out My Back Window #47

Originally posted on Facebook HERE

I have no idea what I’ll be writing about today. This is the 47th installment of the “looking out my back window” posts. I take the photo, and start writing. Hopefully something comes out that interests or resonates with someone else. I think some of these posts have turned out extremely well. Certainly, some are better than others. But I guess it’s all relative. Some of the posts that got the most interest were posts I thought weren’t all that good what I hit the button. Others I thought were great – crickets. So, what’s the topic for today? Earlier today I was thinking about what life was meant to be for humans. Like – were we meant to go to school, get a job, work for money, retire and die? Nothing really wrong with that, but my mind was also thinking about Thoreau going and living in the woods. I like a lot of Thoreau’s quotes, but have never been able to get through “Walden”. I don’t really know much about him at all, so I only mention it here because it got me thinking that… well, take today for example. I got up whenever I wanted to. No alarm needed on Sunday. My schedule was free. Do what I want when I want to. Doesn’t mean I won’t get anything done. I have these posts to write weekly, I have to type the book up today as much as possible, and take care of a couple things around the house. But there’s no real timeline or pressure to have any of that done at a specific time. If a few things don’t get done, it won’t really matter. We could decide to do something else and blow it all off I guess, eventually the work will all get done. But tomorrow… there will be an alarm. There are several appointments at very specific times. Along with that can come a certain pressure, some anxiety, frustration… I don’t really like getting up at 5:30AM, but I almost always do. Why? I could structure my days differently. And why, if I know I have to get up at 5:30, do I sometimes stay up until midnight? Perhaps I could structure my bedtime differently to accommodate enough sleep. I’d like to do yoga, I’d like to run more… can’t seem to get those things added to the schedule anywhere. Meditation daily? My phone gives me reminders that I should do it… but I almost always don’t. I think I could totally design a schedule that would accommodate everything I’d like to get done. Get enough sleep, time for meditation, yoga and running a couple times a week, strength training, work… I’ve thought that for years, though. I really thought I was going to get it done after I returned from Florida, where I was doing all these things (I had to work every week day while I was there). But, a month later – it’s the routine I had before I left. Routines are so hard to break. It’s like you have to hit a bottom before you’ll get enough impetus to actually make the change. So – knowing that you can make a change is one thing. We could all probably think of things we’d like to spend more time on, and ways it could get added to our schedules… but actually making the change? That’s tough. The times I have made changes came after I hit a bottom. Drugs & alcohol. My weight. Both had to get to a point where I just had to change because it affected me in a negative way mentally. When I did change, the changes I made have been life long to this point. Does it really have to get that bad before we walk away from a routine that perhaps no longer serves us? I’m not sure I have the answer. I just know, for me to make a lasting change I need to be committed. Committed to doing things differently. That commitment comes from inside. From the belief that this is important enough that a change is necessary. And for that reason many people live lives of what Thoreau called “quiet desperation”. The routines we’ve set for ourselves are very hard to change. They need to be examined, though. With an open mind to new possibilities. We get one life. Let’s try not to have the same experiences forever. What can be changed that would bring you more joy? Is it worth it to you to actually go for it?…

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